Counting Candles

Well another Birthday has been and gone and much like Christmas and all the other holidays, although I had a lovely day it was a little anti-climactic.

The last one and half/two years were absolute hell health wise, but I’m so grateful that I was able to survive them, and I certainly learnt a lot, not only about my illness but also about myself.

I can’t begin to express how incredible the last few months have been and how much my life has taken a turn for the better. Not only with my mental health but also in every aspect of my life. It’s like the black cloud that has been hovering over me has been lifted and I have no fears about it ever coming back.

More than 3 months off all psychotropic medication. My kidney has repaired itself and my thyroid is almost back to a healthy stable functioning level.

I’ve rid myself of my coca cola addiction. I’ve incorporated exercise into my weekly routine and I’m more focused on my nutrition.

My mood swings have disappeared. No rage, no aggression and no paranoia. Not one episode of delusion, hallucination or psychosis. No rapid cycling, no hysterical crying. No sadness, no mania.

No stuttering and minimal insomnia. My energy and motivational levels have skyrocketed and my rational thinking is back.

To have control of my mind and emotions again is like no gift I could ever have wished for.

Don’t get me wrong, I haven’t turned into some organic, nature-loving hippy. However, now I am in a place where I have control of my life I am able to make the right decisions for myself and have the capabilities to follow through on what is best for me and do the things I love. And in that regard I have definitely changed my lifestyle for the better.

I still work hard to minimise stress in my life. I take super food products to make sure my body and brain are getting all the nutrients and natural boosters they need to operate at their full potential.

I never thought I’d choose a life medication free and I still believe that everyone with a mental illness needs to speak to his or her Doctor about a treatment plan and strategy that best works for him or her, and whether that entails a combination of natural and/or medicinal therapies. But I strongly believe that creative therapy should definitely play a part. I can’t express enough how much my creative outlet has helped me.

It’s saddened me to see of late stories like the Wildness Warrior – Jessica Ainscough, who passed away recently after shunning conventional Cancer treatment in lieu of natural therapies, which could have saved her life. And in more recent news, Belle Gibson who may have allegedly falsified tales about having terminal cancer, and has made a pretty penny contributing her survival to natural foods and alternative therapies.

Taking the holistic approach is a huge step if you are ill, and sharing those life changing and potentially life saving experiences to a following is a massive undertaking.

Wanting to share my story with others wasn’t easy for me, I had to deal with the stigma associated with the perception of Bipolar. And of course it’s difficult to talk about. It can be an ugly illness, but with it comes a lot of beauty and creativity. But I want to make my story accessible, and if I can help just one person then everything I went through would be worthwhile.

I’m not naive to think that things may not get tough for me in the future, because Bipolar Disorder is not curable. But I do believe that I am equipped with all the information and tools available to me to be able to manage whatever comes my way, and if I can share what I’ve learnt with others – FANTASTIC!

In the meantime, I can finally live my life the way I intended, to the fullest and with a smile on my face.


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Sequin Jacket | Thrift } Tee | Camden Town Classics } Jeans | Supre } Heels | Kmart } Spike Bangle | Zalora

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